My Dad

 My dad and I had a very complicated, and sometimes adversarial, relationship. We shared the same name, but other than that there wasn’t a whole lot that we had in common. However, he was my dad and I loved him. He’s been gone now for almost 8 years, and there is not a day that goes by that I don’t miss him. Happy birthday, Pops!

Merry Christmas!

 From my family to yours … Merry Christmas!

Remembering My Uncle Tolen

 My Uncle Tolen passed away over the weekend. He was one of the most caring, loving, and loyal individuals I’ve ever known. A civil engineer, he was also an accomplished classical guitarist. I know he, my mom, and my Aunt Chela are together again, sitting at God’s dinner table, and laughing up a storm. 

When I was in high school, we visited my grandmother, Nane, in Monterrey. I remember walking into her apartment and seeing a photograph of her and me … at least I thought it was me. I told her I didn’t remember posing for the photo, and she explained it was my uncle at age 8 or 9. The resemblance was remarkable. 

Tolen, your family and friends will miss you fiercely. We will grieve, and eventually move on. But you will always be in our hearts and minds, forever. Rest In Peace. 

Happy Birthday, Dad

 Today would have been my dad's 88th birthday. Both he and my mom passed away in 2015, within a few months of each other. I still miss them both very much, but as time moves on, I find it easier to talk about them without the accompanying melancholy I experienced those first few years.

Dad and I had a complicated relationship. I never lived up to what he expected of me, and I'm fine with that. Expectations are just that - expectations. The majority of the time, they are unattainable, and I feel we expend far too much energy and time into stressing over them. Once I finally figured out that the only person on this Earth I owe any explanations to is MYSELF, I finally felt at peace. My mental health has flourished, and I actually have found that my relationships with my family members have improved dramatically.

Here's to you, Dad ... save me a seat at the dinner table, will ya?